Defensive Gesture: Stomp To The Beat

It’s been far more than a little unusual looking at Grey’s posts and wondering, “Wow, does he really think that about us arrow stompers?” In reality, I suppose he’s right. The question should rather be phrased, “Do we really look that freaking stupid so as to cause the rest of the world to think we’re all socially inept?” Of course, different people will have different tolerances for looking stupid in public, and thank the Maker for that; without that egregious imbalance in the shame receptors of some folks, we’d never have “Girls Gone Wild Vol. Eleventy-Billion”.

That said, I think he hit the nail on the head with this: “I can now admit that it does have some appeal as a social game.” I’ve been playing DDR quasi-seriously for about three years now; with a significant amount of that time being spent as part of a regional group, the now-disbanded DDR Erie. The group was comprised of late high-school to early/mid college-age people, all reasonably skilled at the game. When I joined up, I’d only had about maybe two or three months of off-and-on exposure to the game (read: one day on, four days off while my legs were in excruciating pain). When the group dissolved last year, I was at a six-to-seven foot play level (standard difficulty), and I’ve recently jumped up to low eight-foot songs on heavy difficulty. There’s a solid skill progression involved, and with a group of like-minded folks who don’t mind you looking relatively silly, it’s an excellent way to pass time and get exercise.

That brings me to Grey’s remark about losing weight. He dropped all of about two pounds over thirty days– hardly a variation that he or I could consider proof that he lost any weight at all. But, the problem may not be traced to DDR specifically– I’d have to say it was his diet as well. DDR is not that dissimilar from a step-aerobics regimen, as quite frankly you’re still doing basically the same motion with your legs, just at varying tempos and directions. As a result it can help a player burn through a significant portion of his or her activity requirements for a day. However, it’s not enough. Most of the “lost xx pounds” stories on sites like Get Up Move (which is a thinly-veiled advertisement for RedOctane, who makes the DDR clone In The Groove) neglect to mention or downplay the significance of dietary changes in the weight loss. As a personal anecdote, let’s look at my case. As I said, I’ve played semi-regularly for about three years now. During the first two years my diet did not change, and my weight actually increased. Since January of this year, I changed my eating habits and maintained a similar regimen of activity (including DDR); by May I had lost forty pounds. The strangest part was that I actually played DDR less often between January and May due to life interference than I had during the previous two years. So while the DDR-weight-loss stories may not be all hype, they’re still mostly hype.

Ultimately, it is all about a particular mindset that seems to be a bit odd, even among the hardcore gamers. The driving force which keeps arrow-stompers, well, stomping arrows, is the drive to get higher scores and to get better. The coveted AAA (no mistakes at all, all arrows stepped on with “Perfect” or “Marvelous” accuracy and all helds held) is a hallmark of a player’s ability. It means as much to a non-gamer as a .700 lifetime batting average does to someone who doesn’t follow baseball, or a 90% lifetime pass-completion rate does to someone who doesn’t follow American football. Within the circle, it’s a legend. Outside of the circle, it’s meaningless, and admittedly “pathetic awesome”, as had been said. But the competition within the circle drives players to these scores.

I wish, actually, that Grey had had the opportunity to go to a DDR tournament during the trial. I’ve participated in a few, and it’s really at these gatherings that you get a sense of the strength of the community. At one of these events, someone made note that a DDR tournament has a much different atmosphere than, say, a Tekken tournament. To cite his example, the players at the Tekken event were loud, belligerent, even downright mean to each other; shouting obscenities, pushing, even a fistfight at one point. This was a cut-throat match, and there wasn’t even any more than about $50 on the line. This was in contrast to the DDR tournament that we were in the midst of; players cheered each other on, clapped after every match (no matter how good or bad the players were– which was a lucky thing for me at the time), and there was an atmosphere of excellent sportsmanship. Heck, nobody even used any profanity. The top prize was a $300 metal dance controller.

I can’t say with any certainty that the experience is universal. In fact, it may have been isolated to the Pittsburgh region; I haven’t had that much contact with the Cleveland DDR scene, but most of it has been kind of aloof and somewhat antagonistic. Still, it’s what I’ve experienced, and based on other accounts I’ve heard from the US and the world over, I’m not alone in feeling this sense of friendly rivalry.

So, ultimately, while I am a little sad to know that the dance-game craze couldn’t attract one more convert, I am glad to know that Grey gave it a fair shot. Though in all honesty, there was a distinct lack of crotch-grabbing in that video, so his commitment to feeling the groove (to say nothing of his goods) is somewhat suspect at best. Meh, no matter. He has tasted the sweet pain that is Paranoia Survivor; he’ll be back.

Judgement: The Last Dance

Judgement day has come. I have spent four weeks trialling the DDR simulator Stepmania, and in the process also given the real Konami arcade machines a shot. I haven’t gotten to try it out as a party game, or attempted to make my own step files as I initially thought I would. But I have advanced very far in the ranks of difficulty. In my first 90 minutes of play I struggled to scrape together a B on a 2-foot difficulty of Billie Jean. Now, 28 days later, I’ve found myself able to achieve a B on an 8-foot version of the same song. And I know through my experiences of playing that I have the potential to go even further. At times I have procrastinated from playing, the simple fact that I’ve received little joy from it often putting me off, but there can be no doubt that overall I have put in the time and effort to be able to properly judge the game.

Some people got very offended by my initial remarks about the genre, and how ridiculous I thought the whole concept was. I think there is a danger sometimes that when you socialise with others who share the same interests you lose sight of how the outside world views your activities. Most people have their heads screwed on and realise that what they’re doing is a bit strange, but carry on because they find it fun. But it’s very important not to forget the fact that these games are considered to be very peculiar, and the vast majority of people I’ve mentioned this project to find the idea of playing at home on your own just, well, freakish. We all have our own little peculiarities and activities that aren’t quite normal, but most of us draw a line somewhere, beyond which lies what we consider too weird and dare not venture. For me dancing around trying to step on buttons in time with some silly tune was past that line. Perhaps the line between that and Punchmania or the roguelikes I enjoy is very thin, but it was still my line.

Has that changed? Do I now have more respect for this genre and the people that play it? Would I consider playing it again myself? Well… Let me get onto that in a bit… (yes, I like teasing) One surprising thing was finding that quite a few other people I know play this game regularly, or have previously mastered some aspect of DDR in the past. No one in real life, I admit, but quite a lot of my online friends. Of course I knew they were all quite nerdy people anyway, but I didn’t realise just how many actually enjoyed dance games. The genre’s popularity is even more prolific than I first thought.

Getting into the game at first had its difficulties. If anyone decides to try out dance games based on reading this then I think I’d recommend you first try out one of the many Playstation games available before moving on to Stepmania, and making use of their tutorials. When playing don’t be afraid to spread out into more difficult songs. Keep adventuring beyond what you’re comfortable with. If you have trouble then practise on a song you feel you can nearly reach, and if you’re determined enough you will make it. Video game and TV/anime themes may be fun to dance to, but with a lack of clear rhythm they aren’t always good teachers. You’re best relying on pop or dance songs that you know well to help push you up to higher difficulties, which will then make you better at all the songs you have. Improving in just one song will make you better at the whole game. A good dance mat may help – preferably one of the foam filled ones – but with some polystyrene and sticky back plastic you can do a Blue Peter job on a cheap mat that will suffice.

When I bought the dance mat a month ago I also purchased a set of scales for £3 so I could compare my start and end weights. I can’t imagine these cheap scales are hugely accurate, but I’m sure they’re good enough for a relative comparison. I should stress that I’m not very healthy. My diet mostly consists of large quantities of chocolate and microwave meals. I may be of average size and healthy weight, but I’m not athletic in the slightest and never have been. At the start I weighed in at 75 kilos (165 lbs). I’ve been playing for 4 weeks, constantly increasing the difficulty at which I play, often doing 2 hour long sessions, and during that time my diet has been as bad as ever. At the end of it all my weight has shifted to 74 kilos – that’s a 2 lb difference. Not much, but admittedly still a slight loss. Do I feel any healthier? Well, kind of I guess. I certainly have a lot more stamina for the game than I did at the start, but that may just be due to getting used to playing. Every time I’ve increased in difficulty I’ve found it more physically exhausting, but each time I’ve quickly gotten used to it. My trousers feel maybe a slight amount slacker, but overall I look the same.

There can be no doubt that DDR can aid slightly as part of a regular exercise and diet program. However, I think anyone interested in seriously losing weight is better off with the likes of step aerobics that have been more scientifically verified to be of major benefit. I don’t fully believe all the reports of people losing major amounts of weight purely through DDR. If you make a conscious decision to put effort into losing weight then that’s going to have an impact on many areas of your life, such as diet and physical activity, not just one game you play frequently. I would personally like to shift a little weight, but I have neither the willpower nor the motivation to make the necessary lifestyle changes. I don’t think DDR could ever make any significant impact on its own.

As silly and stupid as the genre seemed to me a month ago, I can now admit that it does have some appeal as a social game. Playing with friends is bound to be fun, especially if they’re on the same level of skill and you can compete directly with them. Would I do it myself? Probably yes, in fact. Not anywhere near as regularly as I’ve been playing in the last month, but I’d certainly enjoy playing this game with friends every now and then, especially if I can beat them. However, this is something I have unfortunately not actually experienced, and I think perhaps that if I were to then I would eventually get bored of it. I could never go so far as to compete in DDR team competitions and such – that would just be ludicrous. Still, playing with friends is something I’d be happy to give a shot if the opportunity ever arises.

Would I play it on my own? I’ve obviously been doing it a lot this last month. Being able to advance to such high difficulties in such a short time says something about the game itself, and how easy it can be to pick up and master. I have had a lot of satisfaction and joy through playing the game, whenever I’ve achieved something I thought would be impossible. But to be honest it’s been similar to the sort of satisfaction I get when at work, setting a new record for how many assessments I can complete in a month, or managing to deal with some important case or query well. It’s not the usual joy I get purely from playing a game I like. I have not once actually looked forward to playing – normally I’ve put it off as much as possible. I enjoy doing well, and I enjoy getting to dance to music I like, but the basic game itself just isn’t enjoyable enough to keep me playing. And so I’m hanging up my dancing shoes for now. My dance mat has been packed away, and unless someone else wants to play with me I don’t anticipate bringing it out again.

And now for a little treat. Want to know how good I’ve gotten? Well have a look. One of my housemates got a new phone yesterday, so this was a good chance to test out its video functions. As you can see the framerate and video quality are very poor, but it still looks fairly impressive I think. If you listen you can hear the thumps of when my foot hits the mat – a lot of these steps can’t be seen at the low frame rate, but you can hear clearly how fast I’m going. Overall I didn’t do so well in that performance - my last dance, in fact. Got a C but I should have done better – unfortunately the camera was very distracting. Still, this is the first time I’ve had a chance to see my own footwork, and I was pretty amazed myself.

There have been highs and lows to my month of reviewing, but in the end I think I’ve come out somewhere in the middle. This game may not be for me, but I don’t think as badly of the real DDRers any more. Yeah it’s stupid, yeah it looks ridiculous, but I can see how they could get some enjoyment out of it. I still think it’s pretty sad and weird to want to do it on your own. I mean why would anyone get much enjoyment from this? What is so attractive about the game that would make it fun to play on your own on a regular basis? But I suppose there are worse ways to spend your time, and others could easily say the same things about the games I enjoy.

It’s been an interesting experience getting to grips with the game, and I certainly don’t regret the time I’ve spent on it. I hope you’ve all enjoyed reading these posts. I’ll now hand over to John to defend the game he loves. Perhaps he can explain the joy behind solo play, which has still mostly eluded me…

Another One Bites The Dust

Nothing can make you feel more utterly humbled than to think you’re doing well in a game and then to try out the highest difficulty level. I’ve been encouraged that going to the arcades again would be a waste of time and money, since it seems those machines are too badly damaged to be worth rating properly. But I figured the next best thing would be to download some more actual DDR tunes, and I got a few recommendations from friends. Out of delusions of grandeur I decided it might be an idea to try some of the 10-foots as well. And thus I tried PARANOiA survivor, which I had already heard was pretty scary. Watching the arrows fly past I wasn’t sure whether to laugh or cry… The speed was just insane. If I concentrated I could keep up with one of the arrows. With some practise I could maybe cover 2 of them. But all 4? Holy crap…

The attempts at other DDR songs were mixed. Some 6-foots I did well in, and I even passed a couple of 7s. Overall I wasn’t pleased though. One problem is that I don’t know the tunes very well, so I can’t follow the rhythm as easily. A much bigger issue though is speeds. I’ve wrapped myself in cotton wool to date, pretty much always playing songs around 120 bpm, maybe sometimes a little faster. I don’t mind if a song has some far faster sections within them as long as it goes with the tune well, but an entirely fast or slow song is usually just unplayable for me. So experiencing these very fast DDR songs was pretty bewildering, and I had a lot of trouble trying to keep up. The Afronova songs in particular just spanked my ass red-raw – I was utterly useless at them.

To try to master the highest songs must take a very long time. To learn these by playing on the arcade machines would simply make you very broke. Surely there are better things to spend money on? Like a nice big tub of ice cream? You wouldn’t work yourself into a stupid sweat from that now, would you? I mean, with the sort of money that must be spent on these machines maybe some of the extreme players could, I dunno, maybe save up enough to buy themselves a life? But as much as I deride DDR players I do admit most of them are fairly decent people, and it was nice to find out that some of them do have enough of a sense of humour to be able to pick fun of themselves, as evidenced by the Cornell DDR club videos for 2004 and 2005. There’s an old saying: “Blessed is he who can laugh at himself, for he shall never cease to be amused.” It’s a pity that for a minority of people this is just too hard.

On the subject of things being too hard, I have noticed one interesting thing about playing Stepmania – it has definitely reduced my libido. It seems that regular exercise really does help keep the little pecker down. It hasn’t been this inactive since I was 12! Definitely an advantage when single…

Moving and grooving on (as I’m sure you’d like to), I gave up on those more difficult DDR songs I’d been attempting. Trying to learn to do better at very high speeds seemed fairly futile, especially with songs I didn’t know. I returned back to my old favourites, the songs I knew and loved. And I was in for a bit of a shock. I was still having trouble with some 6-foots, so hadn’t tried much in the way of 7-foot yet. That which I had tried usually turned out poorly. But an attempt at 7-foot Liberi Fatali (the Final Fantasy 8 intro theme) instantly got me a B. I was still having trouble getting Bs in some 6-foots, so this was a great pleasure to me.

So next I decided to return to the song that had first helped me get up the ladder in Stepmania: Billie Jean. The 4-foot I was already very comfortable with, and so now it was time to get heavy. 8-foot Billie Jean was my next target, and I quickly found it wasn’t a complete fantasy. Yes, it was fast, it was hard, and it was filled with half-steps – often with strings of 9 or more in a row, including half-steps in between jumps and freezes. But it was not impossible, oh no. Knowing the beat well helped me immensely, and on my second go I pulled off a C. For the second time in my four weeks of playing this game I grinned and shouted “yes!” Not coincidentally it was on the same song as the last time. But I wasn’t going to stop at a C, now was I? A few more attempts got me exhausted pretty quickly, but I was still only getting Cs. Finally after about my 5th go I managed to keep my life bar at full by the end of the song, and I got a rating I could be happy with – B.

I had a certain glow of satisfaction after this – hard to describe, but it felt good. I’d achieved something I didn’t think would be possible in the time I have. It was through hard work and determination, and in the end that struggle paid off. It left me very sweaty though – extremely damned sweaty. Heard the expression bathed in sweat before? Well, for once I know how it feels – it seemed perspiration was oozing from every inch of skin on my body. Except my feet, strangely… But getting a B in a 8-foot difficulty song was most definitely worth needing an extra shower and change of clothes. It’s a proud achievement for me, and a great way to end this 30 day project.

For end it must, and that end is most certainly nigh. My final tango with Stepmania is due tomorrow, and my ultimate judgement of the game must come then.

Positives: I still keep surprising myself with my ability to improve. Just when I think I’ve hit a solid barrier and I can’t progress any more I find some area I can improve in and my skill at the whole game advances even further.
Negatives: For once I don’t feel I have anything really negative to report here. Actually, one problem is that the mat is getting increasingly battered. If I wanted to keep playing then I’d have no choice but to buy a new pad to be able to dance more properly. Still, for a free program it’s only fair that you would have to buy a decent interface yourself, and the foam-filled pads aren’t all that expensive.
Overall so far: Playing the arcade machines has made me respect the ability to play at home more. Previously I thought it was pretty sad and pathetic to play on your own at home, and that the whole DDR genre was probably far better when played with friends. I do still think that now, but I at least see how there are a lot of major advantages to playing at home as opposed to the expense and troubles of using an arcade machine.

Sonic Boom!

It’s been almost a week since I made a post about the actual game play and game experiences. I wish I could say something cool and epic was holding me back, like having to fight Satan himself for the souls of all humanity, and his chosen battlefield is the grid iron of Madden ‘07. I want to say that, yes, after the seemingly infinite jabs and pokes from all the demons in Hell itself, as well as The Fallen One using perfect control of the blocking feature to break a few long rushes, I emerged victorious in the most perfect game of football ever, score of 2-0 in overtime, 95% rushing plays on both sides.

But I’ve just been lazy. Still not in the habit of updating a site with words and stuff.

So, yeah, three games into my season on Madden ‘07. My Bills are 2-1, losing the first game that was close in the first half but pulled away from me in the second half. I won the next game against the Dolphins, who are arch-rivals with the Bills. This last game I wiped the floor against the Jets, beating them 40-17.

But it’s taken the whole week for me to play three games. I can, at most, play two quarters of football in one setting. And it’s not like I’m playing long periods either. It’s the five minutes per period that’s the standard for Madden games. I’m just finding this very, well, boring. It’s boring when I’m winning, it’s boring when I’m losing. Boring in the morning, boring in the evening, boring at dinner time. I’m going to try and bump the difficulty from rookie, the lowest, to pro, or what ever the next easiest is.

Maybe part of it is that I’m starting to get the controls. My rushing game has definitely improved, I understand having to wait for the blockers to do their jobs and for the lanes to open up. I am reading the defense well, and calling hot routes. Hot routes are sort of audible that change the route a receiver is running. When I call a pass play, and break the huddle and get to the line, if I see a defender somewhere, I can change the route to exploit the weakness. A week ago I would have been totally lost at what to do. Now, I am master of buttons in a game!

If I’m not bringing the funny, it’s well, despite my new found mad skillz, it’s the game is dull. I pass, I run. I throw a few completions, I throw an interception. Defense comes out on the field, and it’s just the opposite of offense. I pick plays at random, end up not controlling a player cause if I do, the other team will get my precious into Mordor. Or something…

…and I know if I had bought the PS2 version, I’d enjoy all this bantha poodoo somewhat more. The PC version lacks Madden Points. These are little bonuses you get for scoring a touchdown, making an interception, rushing for x yards, and other little in game milestones. Save up 100 Madden Points, spend it on a deck of cards that’s pretty much worthless. But I think this would solve a lot of my boredom issues with the game. It’s the same reason I enjoyed the Tony Hawk skate games. Sure you just skate around the same eight stages, but there’s different special jumps and grinds and things to do. You’re not playing to complete the game of skating, you’re playing to collect all the hidden actions in the meta game. The sad thing is, this might be the sort of crap that’s in Superstar Mode, and I may, if the increased difficulty of Franchise Mode doesn’t help, have to submit myself to that.

There is one bright spot, and it’s in a location I thought I wouldn’t like. The soundtrack. No, I don’t like a lot of the R&B-slash-hip hop-slash-rap music, but dear god, if these files are mp3s on my system somewhere, I’ll be putting them into my iPod. When iGetOne. When iHaveEnoughMoney. No, not the R&B songs, but Madden’s dealt with NFL Films to get a lot of the classic background music the NFL Films have produced. It’s odd, when one of these cue up, it’s like I’m watching a highlight reel or something, yet I’m playing the game myself. It goes back to that make it real/make it enjoyable ratio I’m sure I mentioned sometime before. I hear this music, and I think back to the best the game has to offer. The tape of the Bills “Greatest Comeback In NFL History” has songs from this soundtrack. The heroes I grew up watching, waiting in line for two hours to meet, cheered and jeered every Sunday, those memories flash through my head while I try to pretend I’m on the other side of that fan exchange. These classic tunes, if nothing else, make the price of the game money well spent.

Short, blunt, and to the point. I’m like Fox News, only smarter. And full of truthyness.

Positives: DUN dada DUN dada DUN dadatdada DUN dada DUN dada DUN dadatdada…NFL Films soundtrack.

Negative: In the rain or in the snow, pass the ball and run it for’d. All I ever want is for this to get interesting…

Opinion Change: Game itself much decreased. Though I’ll be poking through the files to see if I can grab me a few NFL Films mp3s, it’s not like I didn’t pay for them….

Interrogation #2: Sunday, September 3rd, 4PM EST

An Interrogation is a live event designed to help the members of the community that The Unbelievers mock defend their game. Within the game, the Unbeliever working on the game will (hopefully) be joined by folks like you who’ll help him or her learn the ins and outs of the game, and respond (in a civil manner) to the criticisms raised during the course of the game.

When: Sunday, September 3rd, at 4PM Eastern Daylight Time (1PM server time) for two hours
Where: World of Warcraft, Anvilmar server, Darnassus
Who: Night Elf Hunter Ceilai
Why: If I’m a n00b, why don’t you folks show me how the game PvP is supposed to be played?

I’ve decided to give the so-called WoW community on Anvilmar one more chance to redeem itself. I know there are people playing the game, and I know there are people on the damn server. So I’m scheduling this out a little ways to make sure that the folks who think they can sway me from my current disgust know about this. This is your last chance to defend the game in the eyes of The Unbelievers, so make it a good one.

Again, the ground rules laid out from last time still stand. Moreover, I’m Level 10 at the time I write this and I intend to hit at least 11 or 12 in the time between now and then. Probably won’t be playing much tomorrow due to life concerns, but hey, we have a full three-day weekend ahead of us. And three-day weekends were made for catassing.

Bring it on, punks. We’re doing Warsong Gulch up Unbeliever style.